Tuesday 25 September 2007

Ross Kemp on gangs

The absurd Ross Kemp is on TV doing a series about the world's toughest gangs. On the trailer (no, I don't watch it) he is shown driving through a supposedly dangerous street in Jamaica saying:

"Everyone we see is giving us the eye, so it's literally like a war zone."

Erm, Ross, but are you sure that a war zone is characterised by a load of people 'giving you the eye'?

Now I see! The horrors of war are newly apparent, thanks to Ross's insights. I can imagine Ross, wide-eyed with terror, interviewing soldiers about being surrounded by Iraqi insurgents who are ALL prepared to "give them the evils".

"We've just been in a bar, and the barman didn't even smile at us, even when we left a tip", says a shocked Ross.

It's only by the bravery of Ros Kemp that we can truly understand what it is like to be in a war zone.

4 comments:

Amanda McLaughlin said...

My mum and I were just discussing tonight how Eastenders actors are slowly, but surely infiltrating society. Michelle Ryan is the Bionic Woman. Ross Kemp walks amongst gangs. Did the original writers know the potential for world domination? Were they adequately compensated? Were they adequately controlled? Sweet Jehovah, I'm building a bunker.

Rob said...

I too have noticed this trend. It is my view that very soon every single decision in the world will be taken by a combination of Simon Cowell, Supernanny and Ian Beale.

Unknown said...

I hope Len Goodman is involved too. Is he a judge on Dancing With the Stars in the UK as well?

He is honest, but kind, and knows a good analogy. He likened Scary Spice to a pickle tonight. Why didn't I see that before?

Rob said...

Yes! I love Len Goodman. He truly is a good man. He is so kindly. He radiates warmth like a dancer's crotch, only not as moist.

I want Len Goodman to be my new Daddy.